Tuesday, 23 August 2016

A Layer of Skin..

The human body is; so vulnerable to injury.. its a bag of Blood in a skin bubble.. so easily ripped open... so easily destroyed... from within by poison and without by many a blunt object... and those with bad intent..

a thin Layer of Skin, displays a book a thousand times thicker... and a character that cannot be faked or replicated... only on film can a being live forever.. in the same moment of time: repeatedly...

Art is a growing Panacea of positive re-illumination.. only in Art can we begin to see the World as it is not.. (see anything Banksy, the Messiah of selfless free art for all, for free) yet we are so blind to beauty, we can still see the Advert.. the thought, that became a visual word... in an Ocean of meaningless communication, Art is life... the signature of a soul.. left for others to re-discover, the truth is not really all out there...

it's inside... seek within.. the only contemplation worth perpetuating is the pursuit of 'Fun'... without fun; you are no-one...

Art is the recording of Fun: fun is the inexplorable boundary's of how far out fun can go... generate fun and wonder, laughter and merriment... only the happy are conscious.... the sad are alive... but 'living in the past'... and dead already.. it is those who go out and find the inside; out there... far out... communicate integrate and tolerate the ideas of others... the Pe@cemakers are the real Fun seekers!..

get to now; via, Fun and Art... have fun... lose yourself in the pursuit of as much fun as you can find; give; and share... it's everywhere..

Be 'There' not somewhere else... Higher consciousness is not an exam, it is a letting go... to find a new grip... when you do.. help others find the same trip... just one tablet for a lifetime of endless high's..

I call that a bargain... buy 1 get free.. from all other addictions... right here ready now; to share it.. instantly... by semantic metaphor.. above..

Pax Christi = 3; you; (Mum) god of love; and me.. we Happy three.. for in our true hearts we continue to be united; no sorrow is unrequited.. till the membrane bursts.. and you are once again ripped untimely from a woman's womb... so soon are we all parted..

But soon reunited.. in the quantum Deserts of square sand.. where spirit no longer requires matter and all is at hand.. in a grand design, which as we pull away on a slow 4k drone tracking shot..

You will see the wonder; of the Thunder.. and the magic of a good Heart.. just believe there are good people in the Streets.. "not many" but there are some, one or two.. who, if you ever meet em; will change you.... 

Angels with Dirty faces, and ragged clothes.. when you truly help another, you are making miracles accidentally; that can come back to You.. in the diffused kaléidoscope of retrospect.. as a living 'thing'.. a memory of Happiness is worth Crying for every time... when were you ever happier?... you can be innocent again.. do I have to tell you how?... isn't it plain for idiots to see?.. when an angel finds you, you find your way back to who you were supposed to be..

ps:
May you be near when they pass Your Way... may they see the potential in you that I see; right now... may you always be beautiful.. and in the transcendence only an Artist can know, or see.. may you stop traffic in the street, to bring your beauty into this world.. and all who you touch make a better day.. for You Danni.. my NY:NY personal BFF till the end of the internet.. You brought me more Joy than i can contain... it's insane... I miss you badly... You half crazy Cow...

That there is You; in this slot; of eternity.. you will never die; please believe me.. thought we may never meet again, remember I am your true friend.. Now I know you were sincere... oops 5 years too late.. ding ding.. END of round 9...

though we never spoke.. I will never give up hope.. that somewhere out there one spoilt child is Grateful... and that kid is You..

Learning to give Love is an Art-form, from a Tortured soul.. on a bed of thorns... Pain can turn to Paradise, in an instant.. the instant you find.. Fun in Pain.. lol...  with someone who can take it and "give it".. hey Janis.. sorry I was possessed.. hey; I'm a total blank now!..

only a quadriplegic understands what it is; not to feel pain, the absence of pain does not validate a conscious mind: or deny one... The observer is the only person who can ever exist, in their perspective and angle of perception, and supposition of what they actually saw.. only exists in Modified reality.. please can we see it too?.. only in Death does life start to get, more interesting..

Amen +

C Da GoD of Harlem... and find an elusive Rose.. with an irresistible mystique of an old friend... who can ever forget the smell of New York City... it's a perfume in itself..

God Bless My distant Blood in America... good luck to find salvation before Your debts suck you dry and you die... Hard luck cousins of no particular significance... in Sacramento... a City for Losers.. and Deviants... like my Animal sexing perverse fat cow couz.. only a 1000lb bear can find her ass... digging through folds of ice cream flab... its a miracle She can use a tampon with so much endless flab, filling in her every crease and crevice... 

She has a toilet carved in granite, coz no other material can stand it.. Her Ass is visible from the moon.. when She shits the whole of Northern California.. has stillbirths... her shit kills all life... have mercy for her husband... he got to wipe her ass..

using a train to drag old Circus tents to wipe Her endless Ass of perpetual dribbling shit... 

god forgive the slut.. She cant help sucking cocks... She was always Hungry.. it's how she feeds her kids... Ahem... from the Gutter entertainers are Begat...




Monday, 22 August 2016

Being straight is a Nightmare..

Reality; whatever that actually is.. horrible when you have to be without the 'Lens of altered consciousness... if you are dependant on another thing or another one.. addiction; is the fear of letting go... to a comfort... that sustains you..

whereas The slimmers disease, 'Vitae-phobia' as I call it.. the desire to look like a skeleton retrieved from the ovens a Auschwitz.. their comfort is the opposite, Denying the comfort of Food from a tormented stomach.. like Egomaniacs do with distorted self image predominant.. over natural life.. their life is very short.. and only a thin thread of 'sinew' holds them aloft.. Dear old Anorexia a whole lot better than Dyspepsia.. the veritable Anti addiction to food.. Christ if they only knew what they were missing... 

But an addiction that sustains you from Gut churning cramps, and a nausea from 'just being alive'..

that has no equal in the organised chaos of an addicted mind.. the irony is; addiction can mean not taking that; which you most need.. an inversion of addiction itself... denying a fix that will heal you..

go ahead look down on others... but remember you are not safe to condemn those who are helpless... one day you will be helpless; and nobody will come to save you... Your days are numbered; all life is finite.. However better you think you are; you too will have the Death of a Pauper... poor for lack of strength, to breath; eat; and carry on..

not long now.. when most of the future is behind you... what could you look forward to?... a quick demise is much to be hoped for...

Remember suicide really is painless.. it's just a pity more people dont do it... why?.. coz Scum suckers without a soul; only live for pleasure.. death awaits at your leisure... Couch potatoes will die on the sofa.. just when your favorite Show begins on "Terra Nova"..

Death is the final act of Birth... it's only then do you really get born.. dont run away in fear.. Embrace it: best advice ever given from a dead man who got to live again in you.. as you will do another..

But; only if; you have the Soul to JUMP.. into the void of a dark Quantum.. where there are no guarantees of survival at all.. accept annihilation or rebirth.. only the brave in spirit get through..

Saturday, 20 August 2016

Love is for the Dead

The Dead?.. of course; they are who we owe our existence.. Their Hopes for us (the living) are unchallenged..

Love is wasted on the Young.. nobody gets it; until.. it's almost too late.. what is mistaken in early life as Love is a trick masquerading in desire and selfishness.. in passion and risk taking foolhardiness... that gets this world overpopulated with worthless Bums' like me.. and most of You... Who achieves greatness deliberately?.. none.. it takes a quadra trillion to one.. an accident of a personal given Majesty; to hit the whole checklist, of Good Bones with a wonderful skin.. and every true virtue within..

only the Humble; truly Natural and well rasied attain the golden goal of "being OK with who you are"..

Dont Mock the Dead.. don't you realise; you are laughing at yourself.. The Dead are the truly fucked.. I owe You more than I can ever Repay.. those who steal; are stolen from.. as an outcast must admit they do not belong.. dont fit in the designated level and civilised appropriation of manners and reason.. in persona with a real life in your face, and charm to burn...

Forget it I'd rather love a dog... people are Capricious and Duplistic.. coz the dopes are too trusting and simplistic.. fools who get taken for a ride.. "and never come back"... false promises are woven on the carpet to Hell.. 

An old Girlfriend once said to me.. something that Shocked me deeply.. coz I had never heard her say anything "that Profound" before..

SHE: " I dont want someone I can live with.. I want someone I cannot live without.. "

by then; I was a Cuckold already... 2 weeks later I was sent to the trash heap, where all fools souls lay until they disintegrate.. that old halfway house called.. "Heartbreak Hotel"...

she also said something else that Shocked me.. after we broke up she wanted a bit of fun to remember me by.. so We met went to my room, Obviously I dont need to illustrate it!.. your dirty minds can fill in the omission..

Just after we got tempoarily conjoined by the Genitals she said in a very cold voice, "to get my attention"

SHE: "dont come inside me... I've got a hot date tonight, and I dont want your come.. on his Tongue..."

Now; you get why I love words so much... they reach a place that mundane fornication or Sex in general; has yet to find... will ever find.. 'The Encrypted Orgasm'.. to come in Public.. yet still be deemed decent; with words from the vulva of your mind.. that reaches touches and penetrates.. right to the Gut's, the soul.. and beyond reckoning..

to leave a trace.. like a slap in the face... a Hi-5 from a complete stranger; who is on your wavelength and without Danger; get's you!.. you share a moment of spiritual union.. in the moment the hands "Clap".. is Communion..

HE: this is for U, who; I will never see again... 
but am thankful we at least passed each other; once.. it's enough for now, and forever.. it's enough; for me... baby..

Being sappy and romantic now... sniff... (fooled You!! lol..)


Thursday, 18 August 2016

the speed of Life

No Knowledge is greater, than the certainty; that you are loved..

Every Hour feels like a second.. every week feels like a day, every month feels like a week... as you get older time accelerates into terminal velocity.. then you hit the limit and croak... there is no stillness or solidity anywhere.. life is a membrane that stretches until it breaks.. standing still I see life like a crazy time lapse rushing at the speed of life; all around me..

a Dust mite has every bit as much right to life as anyone... and even a Muslim.. too.. There is no truth but burnt remains... Who can believe in the ashes of torn texts.. and modifications.. 


To add one letter to the Law?... the only truth left is in the Photon that illuminates the second sight in; the Powerful and the just.. in mercy Liberty is found.. in conflict hope is ground to dust... where are the great Teachers.. Where are the Just... who is victim who is the slayer... who can kill having said your "Prayers"..

When Pakistan eventually sell either; their plutonium or the Warheads.. there will be 18 Wheel Semi's.. driving through; onward and upwards further North; until they take out every Major City in Europe... call me a Liar?... at least England is afloat with a natural Border.. that has served Her well in the last 1000 years...

But who can stop Hatred from Annihilating it's opponent in the self activating "Software of Islam" it is seeping everywhere like a plant that strangles every root of mankind it touches... it is the scourge of your Grandchildren yet to be.. in great Woe... those who refuse to Ameliorate and integrate must be marked as Foe...

The Real War; is in the Thinking... How do You disarm a "Sacred Invective" sewn via the implanting of intolerance within a child's mind; in the endless Madrassahs that Rape and Corrupt vulnerable hearts.. in more ways than one no doubt...

Hères a new Catch phrase for the Valley Girls.. The only Good Muslims.. Are APOSTATES... that should get you on a "local ISIS top 10 Hit's list" (if you like playing with Death!)

at least they get a credit card more easily.. than a homeless Nigger.. lol.. but they also get State Sponsored Paedophilia.. it's Paradise for Perverts and Rapists in General.. if I didn't have to pray five times a day, I might join em, but Hey I am impotent anyway.. is it a crime to think Yet? Only a God that condones your thought's.. must be a fucking psychopath...

Keep You Eyes on the sky.. Judgement Day approaches.. 
You Tic's.. 




Wednesday, 10 August 2016

The Night My Mother died..

That night.. My Poor; old; Mother; Died... was a Shocker.. and I had no support; Emotional or Worldly; from my 'Would be plutocrat' sell out soulless old fat obese pig Half/Brother.. He was the son of a Stranger... coz my Mother couldn't say no.. to this Fornicator... like so many others; like My asshole Father, She had bad taste in lovers; and frankly was very simple, vein, and not very intelligent, sadly...

But worked Her back to breaking to feed and house me, as a single Mother with a teenage Son, after My Drunkard waster Father Threw me out, cos he got re-Married to a personal AD he saw in the Evening Standard, he saw on his way back from London one day... as Soon as They got tied.. 2 weeks later!.. She gave My Dad an Ultimatum.. 

Either You Get rid of 'Him' or I go... it's a convoluted highly protracted story I dont want to Bore you with.. so I was literally delivered to The town I now still live in.. my Dad was drunk.. all my clothes were just pushed out the car onto a sidewalk parking area and I was 'Delivered'... to my Penny poor Mother working as a Housekeeper in a Grand Elizabethan Hotel..

We had our ups, and downs.. and I discovered MANDREX an old school Barbiturate in Her Bathroom cabinet.. in fact I found almost 20 bottles stuffed with them, Thousands of em... I took the fucking lot... not all at once.. but over a few months...

the night I moved in She had to carry a Mattress up steep stairs, for me to sleep on the floor next to her bed.. She was 50 then coz I was a late child.. or mistake at 34.. old in those days to give birth.. She was someone I couldn't bring myself to admit; that I loved.. but since She has been DEAD.. I now realise helplessly.. 

I loved that Bitch.. I sure do now: Because.. I never forgave Her for something that happened, previously mentioned in another rambling waste of words Blog... when they left my with an old Woman next Door... Coz I was too much Hassle to take out 'Saturday Shopping' in Town..  at 4 years old! I held em up was too much trouble and too stupid too got with them..

and every week for a very long time.. (eternity when your only 4) I never went 'Saturday Shopping' and when my Monster hate filled and very spiteful Brother got back he would enjoy Sneering at me, telling me what I had missed.. and 'Your too stupid to understand anything' that's why they left you.. you hold us back!...

9 years older than me.. and the Nemesis of my early years.. constantly bullied and put down by this Sociopath, well he was to me for most my life.. never any bonding with him.. 3 words describe Him perfectly..

Supercilious condescending and Patronising... a Holier than Thou sorta attitude.. I was always 'going to be nothing' according to him, even at 10 years old I got these endless put downs...

Everybody knew My Mom was near the end... but did He call me? to say what was going to happen, how things would be organised and arranged.. or say sorry in any formal Civilised way? 'Zip Zero Zilch'.. not even a phone call when he was also told.. So I had no Help or guidance of any kind... I thought coz he was Wealthy, that he would easily pay for the funeral... So Emptied Her account 'As I was told to'..

She always said dont worry my little bit is for You.. ***** will pay; dont worry... that little bit is for you.. I even got it on Video I couldn't find.. on a previous smartphone... 

And that is the under text Content of this Blog, the lines it was meant to describe.. the reason I actually was motivated to write this..

Here is where it gets weird.. and what I actually wanted to say in the first place... hope your up to speed by now..

So; I received a Call at 9:20 pm that night.. from a Girl; Woman; Grandma; that I had personally Known for over 40 years!.. since I came to this small Town.. 'Yvonne'... a craggy old slag now.. who looks like a bag of scabs reformed into an old lady.. ha; to think once my dick twitched for Her.. but time takes it's toll.. nobody wants to get intimate with an Old Hag.. except me on rare occasions lol... personal joke of immense proportions... but I digress..

This is the Gal who told me direct.. 'Your Mothers gone'... I drew Breath deeply... thank God I was sober.. and I Drove over there and was at My Mothers bedside within 10 mins..

My Dear Old Ma.. was dead.. But still warm.. Still WARM! with Her mouth open like she was Screaming or allowing Her spirit release.. I took a dozen or more Pictures of Her 'Corpse'.. I was Utterly Bereft.. and didnt know what to do... or who to call..

They told me that they had already informed My Demon Brother.. but I received no words of comfort or condolence.. from IT... I called him but received no answer...


The pictures I took, were 'UNREADABLE' according to my Device.. I didnt get that at all, until I realised... she (My Mom) would definatly not have approved.. being a Woman with sufficient dignity to ultimatly not allow such awful pictures to be seen, except in 'My Memory'..

Which no doubt will also be 'Erased' a memory is so finite.. even Jesus Mohammed and Shakespeare will one day be nothing to anyone anymore..

Which posits the conclusion... Life is almost pointless.. except to the dead bodies that leave thoughts of beauty and perfection in the 7th heaven; of re-cycled thoughts of those yet to be Born...

This is just a Draft, it may be expanded into much more.. or like a momentary lapse of thought squashed out like a Cigarette.. when it has given it's all to satisfy you.. you just throw it away... and dont even remember the pleasure and satisfaction you derived from it's existence...

I will get the final Revenge.. so help Me God, now is the time to conspire the Murder of Satan's Children... I have the address's.. and will sacrifice my life of failure to cut you deep for the misery you also thought you extinguished... and disposed of... Hate can last as long as Love...

Allah Akbar:

when you have nothing to lose; and everything to Destroy.. come to your Brothers; who cries for Blood... fill the roads with rivers... Go Enoch.. nobody heard your true perspectives, or foresaw the dimensions in which threats could exist in open sight...

r90e


What is an Olympian..

To be an Olympian, whether you win or lose.. is to achieve something ordinary people have no conception of.. to dig deep and overcome all the demons of doubt.. and even if you dont get a Medal.. you gave it all you got..

You are still a contender... you strived and tried and yes you died.. but your never a total loser like those who didn't find the heart, the time, and the guts to give it your best shot...

there are no losers; just taking part is sufficient to an earnest Soul.. it is the highest human Achievement on the Earth... to be 'Good enough' to get the chance...

I'm loving it.. watching till 4am every night... it's exhausting..

Monday, 8 August 2016

Summer siesta

As you no doubt are getting; and already got it... I am on a summer Break... by the Sea.. wherever you live in UK, nobody is farther than 70 miles from the Sea.. (FACT).. 

and even though I am actually 30 odd miles from the Sea.. I say fuck the Sea, and seaside... Fuck summer.. I prefer Hell at absolute -Zero... - 459.67 degrees Fahrenheit, which is actually impossible to reach.. (FACT).. it would take all the refrigerators in Texas to even approach that low level... (Seriously) on 0.1 cubic millimeters of (any) matter.. because ATOMS STOP WORKING altogether at that Temp: so is that a secret we have yet to explore?...

It is impossible; for the impossible; NOT TO EXIST.. take a few hours to consider that... ahem... every potentiality is yet to come into existence; Point taken?... it just has not been measured, because It cannot be measured.. by any sentient entity.. in any way: therefore it already exists, but only in Theory...

personally... summer seduces you into thinking about getting cooler.. and after a month of sweating.. You give in..

and look like a vertical Pig posing as a Human to avoid slaughter.. with fat gut hanging out.. etc.. You look like a partly inflated whale dead on the beech waiting to Explode your fat fucking guts asunder when they cut you open...

Claudia Winkleman.. and I both think summer is sheer Hell... Only for Gigolo's rapists and every pervert who goes to the Beech to secretly film Kids playing... like weirdos do..  when you get above 55 Rape is just too exhausting.. you'd rather just think about it... in fact you cant even be bothered to do that.. you'd rather get some Food you chew on..

Because the greatest satisfying intimacy a Human can have; is not with a Genital or Genitals.. depending on your proximity to available opportunity.. or personal risk to losing your freedom for many years...

it is a Mouthful of tasty food... a sandwich is greater than any Sex act you could imagine... when your stuck in a queue awaiting total annihilation by ISIS in an unending line.... and as you get closer to the "Business end" you wonder..

will it hurt?... 90% chance of pain-free Death if shot in the back of the head, with a high velocity .303 round... you better hope they dont experiment with slower physiological finality... but even if it does hurt a lot!.. it will be the last time you ever have to suffer it...

In THIS LIFE... next time; 
you do the bad stuff..

Unless you ever had the Love of a caring Woman to save you from the Misery of endless Repetitive retaliation and retribution..

Only a Woman knows the Profound Gift of Mercy.. to give life as She dies.. Only womankind; can save a World; filled; with Mad; bad; dumb fuck asshole selfish agressive and arrogant Men... who dont have a clue about the real value of life; as a Gift... For all..

AMEN+



Saturday, 30 July 2016

Je suis française partie..

La France est Rien sans ses gens ordinaires unifiés qui se réunissent pour changer la maison très ils vivent ; il est temps pour nous tous de prendre notre culture de retour ; de ceux qui voudraient voler et violer , il .. il est temps pour être vrai pour le drapeau de la liberté ...

Maintenant est le temps et nous sommes le peuple ..
France le vrai défenseur de l'indicible .. le vainqueur ingnorance et de la perversion...

Vive La France Pour toujours.. 

I am 0.8 part French; and; a part of everyone as it happens... We are all Family... no degree of difference can actualité be found in our deepest smallest parts, its time to discover; we are all related and one dysfunctional family... get used to it... or commit suicide by Random in a public place, where you have no idea, how many of "your own Folk" you may Kill..

We are all united in Murder.. Stop killing your distant family's.. via The internet, come together; forgive and forget.. We have a near Paradise to Maintain.. be a pal not a pain in the ass...