I give thanks..

To God, and My Mother.. who are ethereal not material... but when did that ever matter to a simple mind.... how far do you go up the scale of an absolute theoretical fanciful intuitive knowledge... who knows Jack Shit? actually...

I went Rock n Roll tonight.. took a really stupid risk... as I had been without my DOC.. 'Drug of choice'.. or derivative indeed.. and I had won £80 on a scratchcard, so with only £40 more... I coulld Score!!

and after several 4.8 Stella's.. I texted my Contact... told him I already lost my licence Twice!... and couldn't risk meeting tonight (Now last night, as it is passed but still the same night) 

But The Better got hold of my malingering Cringing, and cold turkeys.. and went into terminal Rk-n-Rll Who dares wins, kinda attitude... and with the dtermination of a Secret service agent I drove over the limit for 25 miles, Via all the F=ROADS even Sat Nav has never been Savvy about.. farm roads, so to speak.. that only is wide enough for 1 dang Car!.. even Fiats!..

I slid in the Offal the Mud and the Slurry of a thousand Cows Shitting.. the piss was so congealed it was like pork jelly in a tinned Ham.. I never seen so much Crap for such a long time.. it takes me back to 19 fucking Seventy fucking 8.. for fucks sake...

Oh God I wish I was Somebody Else.. to take the blame.. I feel so ashamed.... for all that th3n; and all this now... but with my DOC.. I would risk 3 years BAN which is automatic, since my last Ban was 2012.. since I was about to drive off a cliff... I am glad they caught me... or I'd never have written this dum blog.. 

It was exciting; Dangerous... and tons of fun... but never were my faculties soo keen and sharp.. when a reward of great equal.. equals the pleasure you seek.. it is virtually Divine...

Drugs are the only way to feel almost normal: You have no Idea!: till you have an original Idea... in a moment or Rapture.. whether you record it or not is the difference between Ego, and Egolessness.. when you realise you will never be God...

You are nobody.. but a trillion Nobodys.. made China.. you are never no-one until you submit to deviation... a world can fall at the spit of one mans wishes... Who was Fu man Chu?.. who are you.. a Party or coven of power and control... Who "Thinks" for China.. may the Party win... a group of minds is far better than dictator... a One man Hater.. Long live the Great People of China!...

Man I am so glad to be STONED... Again... My Dealer; is a personal Jesus Christ.. "He has touched me with his healing Balm's" and gift's of hope.. for the endless struggle to get some Good Dope...

Unlike an athlete.. taking drugs makes you who "ONE" was supposed to be.. coz losing ones mind makes you feel so free.. no need to cheat the league Being nothing is better than make believe... only the winners are the losers, as the lost are always saved.. achieve Zero, and expect nothing and you will get "Everything".. that you can hold..

if you have an EGO you really will Die.. only the Lost are SAVED!... and always the brave.. just tow the line and behave.. the least of Us; has the Beast in Us... Dont be afraid to be wild for a while...

just beam a violent smile.. '~'